All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
