If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I want her autograph on my taint
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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