Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
