Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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