do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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