maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I think I won the penis lottery.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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