is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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