how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize