Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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