normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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