Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Plan B is the new Plan A
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
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