True but thats because hes a fetus.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
