Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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