I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
