I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Verdict: uncircumcised.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
