It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
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we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
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How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize