Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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