I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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