Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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