if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
