We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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