Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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