Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Buhtt sex?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
