you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
