I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
