After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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