it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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