Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He is an equal opportunity slut.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
