I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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