I want to have your abortion
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
