I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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