The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
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