So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
