just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
