a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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