It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
