Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
