i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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