he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
