So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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