How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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