You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
