Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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