and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
