If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
