ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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