i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
