dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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