ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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