You're my little dorito
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
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You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
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but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS