Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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