can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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